relationship without trust

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relationship without trust

Post by jambos101 » Sat May 24, 2003 3:37 pm

Hi I wonder if anyone has a take on this. Is it possible to have a relationship with someone you cant trust?
Ive been seeing a girl for about seven months and she is hugely sexually experienced. She tells me she loves me but i have been in situsations in her house where she has been chatting with up to five different guys all of whom she has had sex with and refuses to dissuade them that she will again.
She lives in a small village and when i took her out to her local pub she pointed out three men she had slept with for no other reason other than to make me uncomfortable I think.
Recently she has told me she's changed but we had a small disagreement the other week and when her daughter (20) who had brought her boyfriend home went to bed she had sex with him too.
She's currently on holiday with a female friend and although she texted me every day for the first three days I havent heard now for 48 hours.
She rells me she wants to continue seeing me but I think I need more than this, the problem is Im head over heels about her and she changes direction on me all the time. Any ideas?

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Post by Jupiter » Sat May 24, 2003 4:10 pm

a relationship is full of many things including trust and respect. if this woman is talking about all her conquests then she dopesnt respect you and you don't trust her. try talking to her, tell her how this makes you feel but to be honest friendship, trust, respect all build a relationship. they all need to be there and they all need to be mutual rigjht now you're just waiting to be hurt. i'm sorry, but try talking to her and see what happens. i'm sorry but sometimes in these forums you have to be honest, people ask a questiopn and get an answer. but this is just myopinion, i dont go with the crowd.

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no ofence

Post by Mr.L » Mon May 26, 2003 7:11 pm

she sounds liek she dnt want a full tiem one instead jus sex with loadsa guys and maybe a bit of a slut. Also this is very distressing wne u cnt trust the one ur with to b honest wen dis hapend to me i dumped her and dealt with the pain str8 away instead of continuous 'whats she doing?' and the am i being too jealous or paranoid routine. So u mgith do urself a favour...

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Post by primalsurfer » Sun Jun 01, 2003 12:10 pm

I've been in a similar situation before where my now ex saw absolutely now problem with openly flirting with compelte strangers while I was either standing right next to her or close by.

On our own she loved me and there was no one else, but when we were out together or she was out on her own it was a different story.

If you havent agreed to an open relationship and she's sleeping with other guys while seeming dating you then there's something very wrong there, at the end of the day it's up to you, but it seems as you are lining yourself up for dissapointment. maybe it's a case of her not knowing what she has until it's gone, give her the flick and see what happens she might find a new level fo appreciation for you and change her ways, if not then you're better off with out her.

good luck
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Post by misatok11 » Wed Jun 04, 2003 11:10 am

You need to talk to her and ask why she is telling you about the past. You are her future just now.
Try and take things slowly and see if she sticks around. Failing that get some time to yourself and find someone who doesnt drag up the past.

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Post by Westwood » Mon Jun 09, 2003 12:07 pm

I believe a relationship is built on 3 things....respect, trust and love. If a relationship doesn't have these three things, you have got to sit down and talk about where it is going wrong.

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Post by Llisa » Wed Jun 11, 2003 3:58 am

HI hun,
This is some serious busines here. You need to know that no, you can't build a relationship when there is a huge problem of mistrust involved. What kind of a relationship would that be? A serious relationship is between two people who are completely and 100% devoted to each other. This definitly doesn't sound like your case! I'm sorry doll, but you have got to let this women go. If she enjoys having sex with as many men as she can...then let her. You deserve better, so treat yourself with respect and get yourself better!
Will be praying for you

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