Is she making a big mistake?

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Is she making a big mistake?

Postby kosmic » Sun Jul 20, 2003 6:22 pm

I have a collegue/friend at work, who has just recently got engaged to an albanian man whom she has only met a couple of times, although they have texted/phoned each other a few times before meeting. This man is currently applying for a british passport.

She is now planning to get married in June and is hoping to fall pregnant before her wedding day because she says it's what they both want. Unfortunately my friend suffer's from learning difficulties and I feel she is going to get hurt. I have told her to be careful but she will not listen to anyone and believes she has met Mr Right.

I know this is none of my business or my responsibilty but I can't help worrying what will happen. I would like to hear from anyone who can give me some advice.
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Postby X_Smiler_X » Mon Jul 21, 2003 2:29 pm

Firstly I'd like to ask what part of Herts you come from (I come from Herts too :O))
Now back to the problem.....I'm assuming your friend met this guy over the internet or something similar?
Meeting someone twice, and then getting engaged...isn't a good idea. I totally understand how her learning difficulties may have confused her into thinking this man really loves her. He can't love her, he hardly knows her properly.
Try and talk to your friend once more, sit her down and calmly tell her how you feel. If that wont work, then i'm afraid you have to let her get on with it. At the end of the day, it's her life and she will do what she wants. All you can do is guide her in the right direction.
Good luck! x
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Re: Is she making a big mistake?

Postby sovs » Tue Jul 29, 2003 3:55 am


I read a similar story recently where the guy just wanted british citizenship, and then left her after it came through.
Not saying this is the same case but with a friend with learning difficulties (no disrespect), could be taking advantage of her. it may help talking to her parents if you can. be careful what you do as if she takes it the wrong way it could break up your friendship, but personally it sounds a bit suss. good luck and let us know.
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Postby misatok11 » Tue Jul 29, 2003 5:49 pm

You are doing the right thing by telling your friend your concerns. Unfortunately most of us can't see the problems because we are blinded by love.
All you can do is be there and be a friend no matter what your reservations are.
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Postby jasperlens » Wed Jul 30, 2003 7:30 pm

hi kosmic,
maybe if would help if you disscussed the situation with someone higher up at work. sharing your concerns is a natural thing to do. who knows she may be happy and it could be true love, but at least she`ll have friends looking out for her.
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