Teen (18) aggresive behaviour - not sure if he can stay living here much longer

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p123
Just Landed
Just Landed
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Dec 04, 2021 9:23 am

Teen (18) aggresive behaviour - not sure if he can stay living here much longer

Post by p123 »

Have had massive problems in the past with him being violent. Hes broken his mothers arm in the past.....

He has Aspergers and its been a tough time but we were hoping now hes an adult he was getting better.
He has EVERYTHING and hes a spoilt brat.

He expects lifts everywhere like its his god given right. He chances plans at last minute then tries to lie and say I told you this.
We know because hes done it both me and my wife.
He goes to his GFs and she stays over too. And shes just as bad. Plans change.

With work, an 8 year old etc its difficult. All we ask of him is to let us know and we'll see.
But nope it doesnt happen. Hes had 3-4 warning about his entitled attitude and reminded that we're doing him a favour with the lifts and we don;t expect attitude.

All came to a head this week, he changed plans again, then tried to say he'd told his mum. He hadn't. She said sorry I can't do it. So hes off on one, it escalated, (mum can give us good as she gets).
Ended up with him blocking the doorway refusing to let her go, towering over her, and vidoeing it all. (Hes 6ft 2 and shes 5ft 1")
Eventually he stormed out and we didnt know where he'd gone. (he'd gone to his GFs).

Tried many times to explain that aggressive behavior like this is not acceptable but all he can see is how wronged hes been and how its so unfair. We've also explained that now hes an adult we have no obligation to have him in the house AT ALL and he really does not want to try the other options.

In one ear and out the other......

Mum has now decided no more lifts. He pays out of his own money for public transport which is going to be a LOT of hassle for him.

I'm like a mediator here. I explained that hes come very very close to getting kicked out. Ignored totally. All he wants to do is argue that hes right and we're out of order.

Any comments?

Right to stop the lifts - at least for now?

I just cannot believe that he does not see that consequences of his actions. Hes got so much to lose but his anger seems to consume everything in his path.

I just cannot believe he thinks its ok to behave like he does. I explained to him if he did to his GF she wouldnt be hanging around, if I did this I'd be divoreced. His answer - well my GF treats me properly not like mum.... Jeez give me strength....

Anything to please help me here!
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